It’s common knowledge that parenting isn’t an easy task; it would be much easier if directions were attached to each child. In Conversations with My Daughter, author Robert Veres takes a humorous approach to child rearing as he applies a firm, wise hand to the parenting tiller.

Veres shares imagined parent–child dialogues aimed at helping parents understand exactly what to say when confronted with the many difficult or unexpected situations they are likely to experience. In this hilarious guide, a father matches wits with his daughter, drawing conversations from every stage of life—from the battle over bedtime and the candy counter at the grocery store to driving off inappropriate (or scary) boyfriends to selecting the right college—along with everything in between.

Seeking to raise the quality of parenthood around the globe, Conversations with My Daughter captures some of the truly inspirational thoughts, wise sayings, and observations that can help parents guide children through the turbulence of adolescence—and provides everyone with a few laughs along the way.

"Hi darling. What are you looking at? It looks like a lot of pictures of boys."

"It's a pre-teen dating site. There just aren't any interesting men in my junior high school, so this expands my dating pool."

"Now I'm curious. What do they say on there?"

"I've picked out some of the more interesting ones. Look at him. Isn't he hot!"

"He looks like he's in his thirties. Is that a switchblade in his hand?"

"He might have gotten left back a few times. Look at his profile."

(Reading) "Dangerous misfit with a violent criminal record looking for young innocent chick who likes bad boys. Sexual experience preferred but not necessary. My God in heaven--"

"He's cute, but he still lives with his mother. Here's another one." (Reading) "Steaming hot jock with a knack for knocking up girlfriends, looking for innocent young babe with a great body and large, firm knockers who wants to lose the stigma of her purity. I enjoy long walks on the beach until it gets too dark for the cops to find us nestled together up in the sand dunes in a disorderly pile of our own clothing--Daddy, doesn't he sound romantic?"

"He sounds totally unacceptable. Here; let me see if I can find the local police web site. Or do you have some kind of phone app that will make it easier to alert the federal authorities about this dangerous misfit?"

"Here's a nice boy who was arrested for assaulting an entire nursing home. Or--"

"Wait. Scroll back a minute. There, look at that one. He might be somebody worth considering."

(Reading.) "Honor roll student who hasn't reached puberty yet looking for scripture-reading partner. I enjoy chess, reading ahead in my school books, French Club and religious fellowship meetings. Hobbies include stamp collecting and tending my mutual fund portfolio. Copies of my chastity pledge available upon request. Daddy, don't you think he's a little too... boring for me?"

"I think you should give him a try. I'll bet he's a really good hand-holder."

"You think so?"

"Definitely."

Robert Veres has been an editor, writer, speaker, and commentator in the financial planning profession since 1982. He publishes Inside Information, an online resource for independent advisors and financial planners; he is also the author of two novels, Song of the Universe and The Root of All Evil. Veres lives in Pacific Beach, California.